Wednesday, February 27, 2008

brutal

i am not one to sacrifice the truth. and if you cannot handle the truth, please do not read on.

so now i have gotten myself into a big mess, again. and it had happened before and so history does repeat itself, although with a few alterations.

lesson number 1.

relationships.

establishing this is a complicated thing. for one cannot be in a meaningful relationship without acceptance and respect. and honesty.
i make it a point to be honest in almost everything. i do keep secrets, mostly to protect myself and most especially, the people who matter. but once exposed, in a heartbeat, i can also admit to these secrets.
lesson number 2.
protection.
in order to protect someone, you should be ready when the situation calls for it. weighing the circumstances is effective and should be taken into consideration. but then again, acting on impulse is justifiable when the situation calls for it.
protecting people can come in many forms. for this lesson plan, i have two illustrations:
  • protection from bullies
  • protection from self-inflicted destruction

A. if someone you love is being played for as a fool, act immediately on it. do not let others bully them. help them avoid the pain by acting on impulse.

B. if someone is of a questionable character(based on the history of that person), he or she is a threat to one's self. so a real friend would want to help out. by, a) bursting the person's bubble, or b) teaching the person the meaning of the words such as humility, maturity, silence, etc.

lesson number 3.

resistance.

resistance or defensiveness comes in various forms. examples are:

a) inability to look at the eyes of others.

b) inability to hear.

c) inability to think logically.

d) excuses

e) false assumptions, therefore

f) false conclusions.

lesson number 4.

surrender.

giving up does not always mean that you are the loser. giving up is also a making peace with your inner self. because it is hard to talk to a brick wall. and people do not have to explain thmeselves on why they do things. so settle for silence.

this is so subjective, i am writing on what i feel right now. i give up because messages are blocked, and i do not want to waste my energy on negative things. i have worked on being grounded. and brutally honest. and all my friends know me. i have nothing to hide.

i am hurtful, yes, because i talk like this. but i am not a liar. i do not fabricate stories.

you say that we are not worthy of you. but then again, have you ever thought that you are not worthy of us? i feel so sorry that you were raised that way - brats - conceited, narrow minded, overprotected, and spoiled to bits. sickening. you have a lot to learn. so open your eyes, listen carefully, and grow brains.

sorry i had to be the newsbearer, it was the truth, and you don't even have the slightest idea of what went on. i hope you can find quiet within yourself.

and thank you for hoping that i could sleep soundly, because i do have sleeping problems.

i wish you well, too. i hope you grow up. lovely degrees you have there, but then again, they never teach you how to be human in school. they never teach you anything worth knowing. probably, it's just your school.

ha.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

happy vday!

oh well, am not much into sulking and of course, i did expect flowers, but instead i got my period and yelled at everyone. haha.

rex sent me the link to this song and it really is lovely. thanks sir rex!

I'M YOURS
Jason Mraz

Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks
and now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out
I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon its again my turn to win some or learn some

I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love
Listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
Ah, la peaceful melodys
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love love

So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
But my breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a new face and laughed
I guess what I'm saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do
Our name is our virtue

I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la one big family (2nd time: ah, la happy family)
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love love love

I won't hesitate no more
Oh no more no more no more
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved, I'm sure
Theres no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

No I won't hesitate no more, no more
This cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours, I'm yours



Sunday, February 03, 2008

i think i need to do a lot of reading and researching. i don't think my brain is functioning anymore. i used to be a lot smarter. haha.