clumpy lumpy

i had to cry over my modem. and now, it works!

got hungry so i decided to eat instant pho but still hungry. decided to cook soup. but was too engrossed in searching for something, i forgot that you have to stir the instant soup. so i almost burned the soup but got in time to the stove before it gets crisp. found that my soup has become a clump of some dehydrated rehydrated mass of things unknown.kinda saved it, but it's not at all creamy like it supposed to be( says "cream of mushroom" on the package).

anyway, i was really pmsing a lot today. kaya pala i was feeling a little too low, and was really sleepy today. as in really sleepy. i was in the gym on this machine and my eyes were like closing. how come that doesn't happen here at home? hmft.

gotta paint. i need to get stuff done before the 1st of november. so i got no long weekend after all. i'm excited about this though. haven't had the chance to paint in a long time.

about the entry about weddings...tel and i tried to convince my bestfriend not to splurge on engagement rings. kasi napaka western ng idea na yan. sa pilipinas, pag namanhikan, yun na yun, magdala na lang sha ng baka, kambing, at manok. sabi ko, panotaryo na lang sila ng kasulatan, kasi 50 pesos lang yun sa bayan. o kaya, sabi ni tel, puka shells na lang. sabi din nya, dapat, i-save na lang ang pera, para pag kasal na may emergency money. ayun yun eh. pwede na yun emergency ring! labo ko talaga, kasi excited ako sa mga kasal nila, pero lahat ata ng ideas ko, napaka unromantic. hehe.

i miss my FA friends.

wala lang naman

was talking to a married cousin a few nights ago. why do we enjoy spinsterhood daw. haha, it wasn't actually the question. it was rather something like, why we are actually fine with living with our parents now, me and my cousin, tyrone. we're like 28 and 29 already and we live in our parents' house.still. here are the answers.

a. it is unreasonable to rent.work is near and accessible.
b. they prefer that we can be around to help out.

c. after getting over teenage angst(oh, i wanna get out of the house as soon as i graduate, can't stay with the parents because they don't understand crap), it's actually nice to be with your parents when you're already an adult. kasi you actually understand what they actually mean. and you have peace with it. and you appreciate them. nag- abot na kasi ang mga utak.

there. masarap talaga dumating sa punto na maging mapayapa patungo sa magulang. i thank ours for raising us well, and for training us to actually think. and grow.

everybody's doing it, so why would i?

been searching the net for wedding gowns. not for me, though. i'm gonna be a friend's maid of honor. hehe. siguro the day i get married, it'll also be the day that i die. oh, that didn't come out right. what i meant was, never! i'll forever be a bridesmaid siguro. but in kuya jeje's case, the bestman. hehe, we already agreed on that, i'll be the bestman wearing a gown.haha.

it's a trend na here, getting married. almost all my friends are gonna get hitched na, and i'll be helping a lot in planning. yun lang ang role ko. dati nung debut ang uso, ako ang nauna, trendsetter, haha, but now, i think i'll wait for it na masabing fad lang ito.haha

i asked my mum once dati,"mum, pwede ba mag-anak na lang ako na walang asawa?" sabi nya,"gaga ka talaga". yun din ang sinabi nya sa akin nung binutas ko yung tenga ko nung highschool pa ako. oh well. i think that's kinda out of the question.

came upon this site, http://www.thefrock.com/. hanep, really vintage gowns. like the 1920's, and some from the 1800's. astig, what would it feel like kaya to wear a gown of someone dead for like a million years na. creepy. a gown costs thousands of dollars. siguro kasama yung ghost nung nagsuot nun. ehehhehe...boo!! yoshee, i'll buy you a gown from that site. ahahahah!

if ever i get married, gusto ko may theme. parang costume party. oh kaya, come as you are. o kaya carnival motiff. parang may tsubibo shaka merry-go-round. tapos maraming cotton candy! ay, parang children's party...di pwede...ah s&m na lang ang theme. para leather. tapos ang tokens sa wedding ko, handcuffs for the men, tapos whips for the women.

basta, if i don't get married before i turn 30, i'll marry joe black basta he comes in brad pitt's body. well, maybe someday i'll get married in greece. we'll never now.

ooohh i think iterax works...

putos

photos taken by kitty kat. eto na ang cafe ko.

brick walls

i like dead ends. sabi nga ni bugs bunny, they're polite enough to tell you na you're getting no where. i've been slamming on a lot of brick walls lately. it hurts, though, but i have no choice. kasi nga, there are matters na we can't control. and i just need to be gracious in receiving losses. i hope i find 'em back.

painting a red brick wall. i mean, i am making a painting of a red brick wall. i like dead ends. they tell you that you are getting no where.

my eyelids feel weird. they have a need to rest, but i can't make them. it's all bright outside. there are birds singing. and there are people walking. i can all hear them. i hate mornings. everything seems to be so bigger than life. maybe it's because of restlessness. i hate it when i hear the neighbor sweeping leaves. it anoys me to hear tricycles roaring. i hate mornings.

i wish i slam into that certain brick wall that will hurt me so much that it'll stop me dead on my tracks. i just want to stop now. i feel really tired of pushing myself. oh good heavens, i need to sleep, i need my senses back.

i need to do what i must do.

sleepless na naman ako. maybe i should try tiring myself para i can sleep. tsk tsk. it's 6.15 and wala talagang antok. i want to sleep please...

of heartbreaks and empty pockets

my bestfriend is now single and available. so now little misses out there, he's out for grabs! my wish for jeje my bestfriend is that he find a nice girl who'd actually marry him.

tsk tsk. and he was about to buy the "ring". sayang.

oh heartbreaks. and attached to it, getting really broke. haha. i remember dating this guy, who i met somewhere in space, who was really galeng in making me kilig.after a few "moments" treated me like a girlfriend. i am really shallow, you know, text me a few times and you got me head over feet. haha. went out for a couple of times, got really close, and viola! he was fired from his job while we were dating.one day sweet talked me into giving him a loaner so he could get some stupid accesory for his ps. we went to greenhills, holding hands and being cuddly, and after i got his toy, dropped me at the office and two days after that, never was heard from again. until one day messaged me about getting jiggy. ewww. buti sana kung ang hot nya eh hindi naman. weh!

i have friends as stupid as me naman so i forgave myself. actually they are 7000 times stupider than me. so vindicated na ko. funny di ba, mga stupid stories i get to hear about love and stuff and mga stories told habang umiiyak yung storyteller. got me loads of that. but what the heck. funny, may forwarded message galing sa friend ko saying that a woman needs only one man, the man who can prove to her that not all men are the same. actually, not all men are the same talaga, thay vary from bull to bull. haha. but nevertheless, kahit ideny nyo pa girls, we can't live without then and the bull that comes with them. hehe. sarap kasi maasar.

but i'd rather be brokenhearted sa love love na yan. kesa naman kanina. i was trying to get a slot for the art fair on november and had inquired pa ng august. tapos kanina sabi ba naman sa kin, priority daw yung mga more organized groups and galleries. kainis!nakakapikon talaga. kanina nagmumukmok na naman ako, sabi ni mikkey isang art fair lang daw yan. eh. at maraming galleries worldwide. hala. punta ko zimbabwe. or sa qatar. bakit organized naman daw kami sabi ni sam eh. che.

what can i say, maybe i am just not good enough. ok lang meron naman akong super power.