Wednesday, November 29, 2006

i'm in love!

i want these for christmas...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

I now remember my story.

Yesterday, I went to my cousin the dentist to get an incisor filled. A crack came out and the enamel started to chip off, too. Yah, kumain ka ba naman ng staple wire eh, noh?

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting ganda na ng teeth ko ulit. whee!

Anyway, hindi yan ang kwento ko.

After my visit to the dentist, I went to our friendly neighborhood carinderia where mum, tita jo, ali, and my cousin joey were eating barbeque. I was supposed to get barbeque only (no carbs, please), but tita jo was eating this sizzling slice of beef and rice and said that it was good. Oh well. After waiting while nibbling on carcinogens, my food came. I had to wrestle and partly lost to that tough motherf*&@#!. Wow, that one really put up a fight ha. And it tasted blah.

And I had to complain that it wasn’t worth my 90 bucks. Hehe, 90 na nga lang for a tbone thing, nagcomplain pa. and it burned my tongue pa. ayun sabi ni tita jo, kaya naman pala I didn’t enjoy it kasi di ko nalasahan

But, di pa rin yan ang story ko.


Eto na, a long time ago, when megamall was still the hip place to be, me being the coffeeholic that I am, would go to Coffee California everytime we went malling. Unfortunately, there was this one time when we really need to go home, but I really wanted coffee. I ordered a cappuccino to go, topped with towering whipped cream and chocolate syrup. Mum wanted to share the cup. So, we started on our way back to the car. And while walking, I was trying to sip the cream. Eh may sumamang kape. Potek, boiling hot. As in lumuwa ata eyeballs ko! Eh isip naman ako kung ibabalik ko sa cup ung kape eh sabi ni mum hati daw kami…dilemma…ayun, I swallowed the friggin’ mouthful. Three days masakit ung throat ko. Haha. Siguro my mouth was all white nun, kasi seared ung gums ko. Weh!

Story ko walang kwenta. Hahah. Pero natawa ka naman. Hmp.

I don’t feel well.

Oh, no…

I’m starting to go down again.

Poof. I’m back in my reality.

I don’t wanna be sad again.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

oh, kids, beeehave!

mum: sino ang president ng pilipinas?
ali: si manny pacquio!
i gave out detention slips last thursday and now am suffering from it. haha. i have to stay in school too after classes for this.
mikkeli and i have decided to become parenting experts. haha! we've been talking a lot about kids and how they are. so pwede na kami mag hold ng talks. practical parenting. haha! funny this mom who came over sa school, well, she's a single mum. and she way over reacts about everything. she even questions the school's credibility and methods. she said her son kasi is bullied by the older kids. duh, ung kid kaya nya ang bully. the kid kasi is quick-tempered. panu ba naman, he's not even allowed to express anger, tapos bawal sya magcomplain about everything at home. super repressed yun kaya ibang-iba sya sa school. nagmamanifest lahat ng bad attitude nya pag wala mum nya. and the mum accuses pa the older boys na dun na pick up ng anak nya yun.
well, pwede ba, all my grade 6 and highschools students, even the boys ha, are very nice kids and they behave very well noh. it's only now na may instances ng bullying sa school.
she thinks na we should change a lot of things sa school. i told her na we are actually working on it. and hindi na nya kelangan makialam(sa isip ko lang yan eheheheh). sabi ko kay hunny, eh anu sha, vice president ng pilipinas para baguhin namin ang school para sa anak nya? hunny replied na, bka sya vp ng pinas kc c manny ang pres. hehehe!
un na nga, some parents kasi try to bend and break their kids for their own sakes. parang dapat laging good kid para di sasakit ulo nila kaya they control their kids by the neck. what they don't realize eh that it affects the kids psychologically and it stuns their maturity. nagiging poor ang judgement ng kids and eventually pa nawawalan ng character and individuality resulting to poor self-esteem. and so on and so forth. blah blah.
weh anu naman. anak ko ba sha?! ahahha, bad teacher. i just hope na i'll be a good mum if ever i'll have kids. goodluck sa ovaries ko.
speaking of ovaries, kamusta na kaya sila? haha. promise, i'm gonna see my ob gyne na.
oh well.
sabi ni ten ang tanga ko daw.
me: ten anu day ang december 1?
ten: friday
me: eh ang december 2?
huhuhu. i was just asking eh.
i saw happy feet yesterday. whee, ramon and lovelace!
and i had a foot treatment kahapon. sarap. nice feet. kaya happy din sila.
i know madami pa ko kwento but i forgot.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

i just have this funny feeling that things aren't gonna be the same again. and i don't like it.

Saturday, November 25, 2006


long day for me yesterday. i woke up a little too early because of a bad dream, but really, a sweet sms had a great deal of good timing and prevented me from staying too long from dreamworld. anyway, i painted a little more despite the fact that i knew that i had to be preparing for my tagaytay trip.

so i had to rush stuff pa and completely forgot to eat here at home. drove to marikina to pick up samio. then drove off to qc for jez and nowel. the truck's AC was faltering and by the time we reached diliman, i was dizzy beacuse of the heat and hunger.

ayun. being with jez is really a riot. wala ng tatalo pa. basta may masabi talaga di na nag-iisip. i'm sure you'll like jez when you meet him.

drove off to makati after a quick lunch of rice burgers and jez' spam sandwiches haha.

sam's client had installed the painting he bought on his red accent wall. wow. had a giant glass of juice, ay royal pala, and after sam signed the paintings, we were off. oh, but we had to convince sam pa to come with us na lang to tagaytay since uuwi naman din kami.

pagsampa pa lang ng skyway, si jez and nowel became hyperactive.

jez: pzhhhht! ayuz! ikaw ng magaling skyway!
nowel: palakpakan! (claps loudly) woohoo!
jez: yeah, ang init! whoo! mahal to! mahal to! (referring to the toll fee)
nowel: sana mabuksan ko bintana ko!
jez: airplane! palakpakan! sana may marijuana!!
(claps loudly ulit)

and it went on. and on. until we reached tagaytay.

my client, john miller was waiting for us sa sidewalk sa tagaytay, haha. he jumped on the back of the truck and told me to drive down this curvy na road. his place is like 3 to 4 minutes away the 7-11 where we met up. he looked younger nga than when i first saw him sa makati. his place was really nice, mejo modern and maraming paintings talaga. he offered beer and we toured us around the house. sa roof top, you can see taal lake, but the volcano is partly hidden by a hill. it started getting colder and colder. john brought out appetizers and malupet, a plateful of tubes of acrylic paint. he set up a huge canvas. we collaborated on an abstract piece. funny, talagang mahirap magwork together ng walang plano kasi hiwahiwalay kami ng trip.

grabe, funny si nowel kasi walang baong inggles. para ngang bigla syang nawala eh.ahahahah! and si jez was really scared of john's shar pei, sparky. eh he's the nicest and gentlest dog ata na i've ever met. he's quite smelly lang and was shedding skin because of a anti-flea shampoo john used on him.

it was a fun day. lalo na when he paid me. hahahah!

i got home around 12, tired and sore.

at ngayon, wala na akong pera. but i got paint and a sack of dogfood.

i got home around 12, tired and sore.

sayang, russ. haha. i'm sure you would've enjoyed the trip. lalo na yung dinner. haha.

asia and europe. i like that.
i want cake, too, hunny. and a shampoo!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

i heart you world!

so this is how it feels...

last saturday, november 18th, we dragged ourselves off our respective beds to drive to makati and painstakingly set up our 6 meters of wall space. the museum foundation of the philippines held another art fair, Art in the Park, in velasquez park in salcedo village, makati.

the day was bright and beautiful, and starbucks came flowing in. yoshee, my nephew vaughn, jez and nowel were there for the day. ali and russ came( salamat sa starbucks), too. had a wonderful day taking pictures and goofing around. grabe, with nowel and jez around, di ka titigil kakatawa. until nowel farted. haha!

potah, late na. wala pa kaming benta. nakakainsecure. but turned out na mas way cool beacuse, madaming interested. we did sell a few.

and i will be driving to tagaytay to deliver all of my five pieces.

so i found my lucky charm. and i am really just too happy. but it's not for everyone so i'll just be keeping it in a little box and hiding it in my pocket...

i'm still having sleepless nights, but this time, i'm not whining...


oh, and hindi na ako ang grammar police pala, haha!


i love this song.

Still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
Still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
Still a little hard to say what's going on

Still a little bit of your ghost your witness
Still a little BIT of your face I haven't kissed
You step a little closer EACH DAY
Still I can't SAY what's going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to lie
Life taught me to die
So it's not hard to fall
When you float like a cannonball

Still a little bit of your song in my ear
Still a little bit of your words I long to hear
You step a little closer TO ME
So close that I can't see what's going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to lie
Life taught me to die
So it's not hard to fall
When you float like a cannon

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to cry
So come on courage!
Teach me to be shy
'Cause it's not hard to fall
And I don't WANNA scare her (him to dapat, haha!)
It's not hard to fall
And I don't wanna lose
It's not hard to grow
When you know that you just don't know

by damien rice


i heart you!

i've never been this high in two years.

Friday, November 17, 2006


flashback: mid-november last year, i trashed at people and was finally able to face my issues with anger. ground-breaking yun.

and now, i think i have Seasonal Affective Disorder. kasi this is the same thing that i felt last year.

but sabi naman sa akin ni ate anne at ni blythe, wag daw ako mag-alala kasi alam ko daw na may nangyayari sa utak ko so i therefore conclude, hindi pa ko baliw. weehhhehehe. sama kayo sa basement ng med city? =)

i have been blog hopping to kill boredom. mostly teen-age girls. i realized na i have grown much older alone. i'm almost angst-free pala. galing.

gotta go!

Thursday, November 16, 2006


ako, kahapon, masaya naman eh. pero bigla na lang bumalik ung twitch ko. parang naiiyak ako. my face pulls into this frown na, i really don't know. i have stupid fantasies and i have realistic dreams but wala pa rin.

anyhow, i want to announce that may Art in the Park on saturday, nov. 18, 2006. sa Velasquez park sa salcedo. it's a fund raiser yata ng museum foundation of the phils, (ayoko maghanap ng link), but parang ganun na nga. andun na ko ng super aga so mga 10 siguro wala na ko kasi natunaw na ko. sa init at sa araw. kasama ko sa booth, ewan ko lang kung dadating sila, pero sana kasi kawawa naman ako at si yoshee, sina samio my love, jezreel anak, at ang simpleng pintor na si eman. ewan ko lang kay makol. wish us luck guys. madami kaming kasamang mga galleries at mga NGOs. epal lang kami.

nakakapikon minsan pero masaya pa din. nakakabato pero nakaaliw. nakakasuya pero masarap pa rin.

sa dinami-dami ng dinaramdam ko, ayus pa din. bakit kaya.

siguro kasi.

do you actually think that it is possible? perhaps. but maybe, perhaps not.

pero i'm happy, too. you.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


grace started sending messages to see if we have power at home. it was almost lunch and she got worried about her babies because they won't get to watch wowowee. i went, how jologs. that is unacceptable and will not tolerate kajologan sa mga pamangkin ko. and she went, they do this boom tarat thing and they're cute. i go, what?

msg 1: hopscotch pala english ng piko. tingnan mo, may natutunan din kme sa wowowee.

me: how exciting. magbasa ka kaya. mas madami ka m222nan, hehe.

msg 2: kahit nman ilang YES magazine ko, dko ma encounter hopscotch noh, hehe

me: hoy hindi educational ang yes magazine

msg 3: alam ko, pero mas masarap magbasa ng chismis.

me: mas masaya maging smart. hmp. i'll lend you books.

msg 4: love story?

me: i'll start with that.


i want a pina colada. init!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

mom had pizza delivered tonight. two things: either she missed me because i've locked myself up or because she felt guilty making sinigang fo lunch today. when i got home around 1pm, ate marlyn made guisa corned beef for me. and also i made ate marlyn swear that she won't leave me when my family leaves. hmmm...i am just too lazy. i guess it's too hot today. i was on the phone with mike and i just started sweating. ahahhaah. blah blah
kahapon joy called me up. napagusapan namin about how i wanted to live up to 30 lang. and how do i do that? OD gusto ko sabi ko. bakit daw. weird reasons... i've experienced a great deal of things already. as in ok na syo un? oo naman. unless i get pregnant. so what did she think? ok naman yun. kasi when someone says na, oh, i wanna go die na, their friends would go, oh, you're so selfish, a lot of people loves you and would miss you. so we agreed na, bakit, papalamunin ba nila tayo? so it turns out na sila ang selfish for making you prolong the agony. oh ok. we then agreed.
hmmm. weird lang why some people find the concept of death scary. it's a nice topic. it's actually enlightening. try talking about it.


FA Wall:
"nobody cares"
somebody answered:
"not even the carebares?"
then another:
"not even kier?"
"not even zoren?"
"not even zorro?"
all written by different people.

AS chairs:
"push button to eject seatmate"

"push button to eject urself"

“push button to kill teacher.”

"push button to eject teacher"
....reply: "it's jammed! We're doomed!"

AS cubicle:
"Donate your bulbol here.." tapos may chewing
na pagdidikitan. ...

AS chair :
“you know bobo? bobo is you!”

AS 1st floor CR:
“if you forget the past, then you porget the

AS 1st floor CR uli:
“ Im a simple gay “
tapos me sumagot
“sira! Dapat ‘Im simple and gay!’ Taga peyups ka
ba? duh! “
tapos me sumagot ulit (with matching arrow pa na
nakaturo dun sa reply)
“sira ka rin! yung simple is used as an adjective
tapos yung gay is used as a noun. kaya ok lang
yung simple gay nya!”

Chem chair:
“push button to spray acid on prof’s face.”

Another chem chair:
“You Boron!!!”

Bio chair:
"Push cadaver to haunt teacher.”

FO Santos:

Sa Men's CR, facing the urinal:
"Hawak ko saking mga kamay ang kinabukasan ng
"the future you are holding is very small."

sa likod ng armchair sa isang room sa GAB:
“takas ng ward 7”

sa cr sa may math building:
may sumagot:
may sumagot pa:

sa math building, sa likod ng isang “teacher’s
chair” sa 3rd floor:
“BABALA: asawa ni babalu”

sa math 3rd floor, sa isang upuan uli.
"you'll NEVER find what you're looking for"
May nag-reply:
"find x."

sa math 3rd floor, sa isa pang upuan uli.
nakasulat sa armchair:
ta's may sumagot:

3rd floor math cr:
"kaibigan, pagkapatos mong umihi, paki PLUS mo
naman, hehehe."

sa loob ng music room.
“maam _______(music prof) boses palaka! “
tas may sumagot
“nakarinig ka na ba ng boses ng palaka “
tas may sumagot uli
“weh “
tas may nag-react uli
“oo, sabi kokak!kokak!”

Wall ng vinzons
"Do not steal. The government hates competition"

men's cr sa Vinzon’s:
"remember: the hands that clean this toilet are
the same hands that cook your food."

men's cr waaaay above the urinal:
"if you can reach this, the fire department wants

sa isang upuan:
"f*ck nigs!"
may nagreply:
"who's nigs?"

Sa isang lamesa ng main lib, filipiniana section:
tapos may sumagot...
"mali pang grammar at spelling mo, halatang di ka
taga UP"

nietzsche-"god is dead"
God- "Nietzsche is dead!"

sa labas ng PNB:
“in case of emergency break ass and push butt”

sa girls’ CR:
“Bawal ang vandal Dito!...
Mommy said: First Aid Terramycin”

sa girls’ CR uli:
“My boyfriend and I had sex and now I’m pregnant”
“Pray to God”



saturday night was sin night. salamat pau and raens for the pictures, and salamat din you guys for the sarap dinner.

the buffet.
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
my plate. first round pa lang yan. haha.

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wasn't able to force the steak sa stomach ko. but vish also had a feast! that's raens' golden retreiver.
i am still in my baliw mode. i have till thursday morning to finish the two paintings na i'm working on. then, party mode ako. haha, not really, just meeting up a bunch of friends this coming weekend.
spent last night driving to the mall, shopping for bags (habang nagffreak out na ko kasi i haven't shopped in a long time), and goofing around with 8 teenagers in starbucks. i had caffeine overdose and sang all the songs sa radio while driving home.
painted till 2 am and had no problems sleeping. i could barely open my eyes while washing up. i've been waking at 8 am lately and this is really not normal for me. today, i woke up a little later than 8 and painted again. boring. but sleeping without difficulties is exciting pala haha.
oh, last night, while i was walking to my studio with my nephew who had an upset stomach (kasi lactose-intolerant sya), i looked up and the stars were really bright and lovely. when we got to the studio, i looked down and saw that i had different slippers on. green and pink. still have them on right now. haha! but nevertheless, they look cute with my purple toenails. tee hee!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

hope to see you in cebu

i'm still hoping that we visit cebu before mum and dad and my sisters leave for hawaii. i've been wanting to see my cousins again and a guy friend din kasi eh. been itching to go since last year. i hope we spend new year there.
but aside from cebu, i also wanna go to vienna with tyrone, backpack with joy around asia, and go up north with her, too. and beach hopping sa visayas. hmmm...but then i have to pay for my credit card bills first.
ok, so i'll have more time to attempt to study cebuano. my cousins are really mean. they don't want to talk to me in tagalog eh. they insist i learn to understand. they make sure na aware ako na they talk about me in cebuano on my face ha! hmp! kasi naman, i am really bad when it comes to dialects and languages. kaya nga di ako makagraduate eh! spanish 11 na lang, punyeta!
so, sana, sa sinulog, kita tyo.
last night, we pau and i had dinner kina raens. grabe. grilled steak (as in 3 big slabs of it ha), grilled corn on the cob and broccoli, pasta puttanesca and prawns. and a bottle of red wine.
just thinking about it, sumasakit yung dibdib ko.
the two will be posting pictures soon.
i suddenly remembered a conversation between joy and me. ang topic: sex. ay yung lack of it pala. eto ang kakaibang sagot ng mga 25+ years old na girls dapat in defense of being tigang.
after years of fooling around, we find sex unnecessary at this point in our lives. at this age, there's more thrill in being invited for sex than actually doing it. and of course, only a few men are talented so you can always expect a bad lay. and after that bad lay, you'll find sex boring and a waste of time. soon you'll be able to live without it, and you feel liberated because you're beyond sex.
unless a really hot guy comes along, bawi muna ahahhaha!
ay, namiss ko tuloy si joy.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

dada played this at home a few days ago. love it!

thanks, yoshee for helping me! love yah!

Friday, November 10, 2006

la dee dah.


there are happy days coming and i can feel them already.

but then , i know i'll be sad at the same time. the visas we've been waiting for arrived and even though we'll be having tons of reunions and parties and night outs with the family, malulungkot din ako. oh, well. mum and dad and my sisters will be leaving in a month siguro. huhuhuhu. kawawa naman ang 27 year old kid.

today, we had a surprise despedida party for my tita mel. she'll be leaving on tuesday with her husband, tito rey, and my cousin phoebe. she is the principal in the school i work in, and she was my principal when i was still studying there. it was a bittersweet moment for the kids and her. as in humagulgol ang mga kids. and super hug sila kay tita. i cried din. but sabi ko di naman yun goodbye. so i said, see you later, instead. bahala na who goes where.

however, this is a nice time in my life inspite of being poor and strange.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

funny weird

i feel funny. a nice funny.


i'm not lying, i am flying, i'm not lying, i am flying, i'm sure.


you know what annoys me? coincidences. because i have this thing for wanting signs. and you know what? i am vulnerable. but i am so in a la dee da mood.

my little nephews are falling in love. i laugh at it. love. juvenile and silly love. and i always tell them, i wish that they find girls that are intellectualy stimulating. and i take out their hearts and rip them to shreds because i am so unromantic. well, i know, i know, puppy love is sweet and youth should not be wasted on matters of consequence.

and they laugh at me because they have to tease me for being an old maid. hoy, 27 is ot old, noh!

i got hooked to this koreanovela, my lovely sam soon. it's the story of a chubby 29 year old girl who broke her heart but eventually found love again in the arms of a younger and kadooper cute guy. and i go, aja, sam soon, for all the normal-looking smart girls in the world! ahahaha! so now, i'm not too grumpy and i'm sure i have a chance. tee hee. and i am romantic. ask my neighbors.

and they tease me again for obssessing over englishmen and their accent. and i freak out because mr. bean is english. now a nephew sends me messages that go, hahahaahah mr. bean! weheheheh!

well, in any case i get old before finding a guy with a smart accent, i will just have to resort to playing mary poppins to my nephews' future children.


but lately, i have this weird churning in my insides. i guess, i'm a kid after all. juvenile and silly.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

found this. it's my favorite picture of me, minus the background, salamat sa photoshop!haha! i want to look like this again, virginal,haha, kwela... sabi ko kay ten,i look innocent, sabi nya, nagpapanggap lang ako. hmp! potah, 19kopong-kopong pa to. read: 1900's pa hindi pa umabot ng 2000! weh anu naman!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting ipukpok nyo sa bato! goodbye cake and donuts... pero gusto ko pa rin ng prunes, raens!
gotta go paint. mwah! goodnight, world!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

i wish that people who love me for my mind show a little more flexibility haha.

Monday, November 06, 2006

pathetic and bored

i answered the stupid questionnaires posted sa bulletin part sa friendster.

tee hee.

*** nang dahil binuksan mo to.
sasagutin mo din
to ng tagalog at walang kasamang ingles na salita.
ayan! simulan mo na. pero basahin mo muna ang
mga yan. ***

makulit ka ba? kung oo, paano? -
~*> oo, mahilig ako mangasar, pero alam ng mga
kaibigan ko na pag nilait ko sila, ibig sabihin,
mahal ko na sila.

ano ang madalas pang asar ng mga
kaibigan mo sayo? -
~*> abnormal daw ako

pikon ka ba? -
~*> hindi.

pang ilan ka sa inyong magkakapatid? -
~*> panganay

ikaw ba ay isang "positive thinker"? -
~*> nye, ingles un. hindi, magulo lang ang utak ko.

ano ang paborito mong numero? -
~*> 18 hehe, anu tagalog nun?

bingi ka ba? -
~*> ha,anu kamo?

saan mo gusto dito o doon? -
~*> kahit saan basta may banyo

ano ang mga paborito mong kulay? -
~*> berde

nakakain ka na ba ng hayop maliban sa
manok at baka? -
~*> oo, marami na silang mga hayop sila!

galit ka ba sa mundo? -
~*> hindi naman mashado, sha siguro galit sa kin

naiinis ka ba sa mga taong kinukwento
ang katapusan ng pelikulang hindi mo pa
~*> hindi, kasi sinasaktan ko na sila bago pa nila

saan ka mahilig sa sapatos o sa damit? -
~*> sa tsinelas

sino mas gusto mo si juan o si pedro? -
~*>si juan kasi di ko kilala so pedro

ang boses mo ba mataas o mababa? -
~*> mataas kasi galing sa bibig,utot un pag sa

nagtatago ka ba ng sama ng loob? -
~*> hindi, mataray ako eh

sumasayaw ka ba? -
~*> hindi, nakaupo lang

magaling ka bang kumanta? -
~*> depende kung sino mga kasama ko

natutulog ka ba ng patay o buhay ang
ilaw? -
~*> patay

mas marami bang naidulot na masama o
mabuti ang friendster saiyo? -
~*> mas maraming masarap haha!

mukha ka bang cartoon character?
~*> hindi.kamukha ko si aiza siguerra,hehe

saan mas masaya sa sun o sa moon?
~*> kala ko ba tagalog lang. koreano yan eh

ano ang gusto mo sa lalake/babae,
mahilig sa sports o sa music? -
~*> gusto ko lalake, ok na ko duin kahit wala
shang hilig sa palakasan o sa musika. bobo ka.

------eto pa---------

1. complete this phrase: "i could be.."
@ stupid.

2. what is the wallpaper on your cellphone?
@ 1g ang phone ko, bawal mangarap

3. did you get enough sleep last night?
@ nope, umaga na eh

4. first thing you thought about this morning when
you woke up?
@ tulog ulet!

5. do u ever wonder why the sky is blue?
@ would you believe that before the great flood, it
was pink?

6. ever tried to skip meals?
@ no, but have you ever tried being bulimic?

7. grilled or fried?
@ grilled. hmmm, kebabs!

8. what makes you unique from others?
@ you tell me.

9. are you afraid of the dark?
@ nope. i love it when it's dark.

10. favorite hangout?
@ in my studio and raens' place

11. people you can't live without?
@ my employers hehe

12. first thing you will buy if given 1 thousand
@ i'll pay up my credit card bills

13. favorite song when you're sleepy?
@ panu un? eh di nagising ako? bobo ka!

14. what are you afraid of?
@ growing old alone.

15. are you a giver or taker?
@ giver, ipagtanong tanong nyo pa

16. if you could choose another name for yourself,
what would it be?
@ brooke shields mendoza! ahahahahazim!

17. what is your mom's name?
@ leticia

18. most recent movie that you watched?
@ dvd, monster house

19. invisible for a day, what would you do?
@ panic. i dont wanna lose myself hehhe.

20. stuck on a deserted island & could have only
one kind of food for the rest of your life, what would
it be?
@ alimasag from hell!

21. favorite tv commercial?
@ as of now, bravia's 250,000 balls

22.if you were dead and your soul was given
another chance, what would you do first?
@ make sure i get born filthy rich. hehe--ako din
peach, promise

23. if you could choose your eye color,what color
would you like to have?
@ i don't really care so long as they're not defective

24. what are the things you always bring?
@ i bring joy.haha!

25. what did you wanna be when you were a kid?
@ saleslady sa national bookstore

26. what do you usually do when the clock turns 6
@ i don't really know, it's too early to tell, haha

27. the color of your bedsheet?
@ sa house, pink, sa studio, madungis eh, i can't
tell na haha


wala lang. beats doing nothing. if i were normal, i'd be probably out malling. thank god i'm not. i'm going to apply for a job tomorrow, wish me luck.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

dog tales

i took cyrus out today for a short walk. i tried the short leash on him. it was really tiring because i had to use force on him so he wouldn't bite on it. kasi naman, it's pink and purple...i can't help it, i want color! haha!

i gave him a bath first though and it's a tough job kasi he's so playful. he is probably around 50 pounds na, really tiring, i was sweaty agad. i didn't take him all around the village, just a few blocks lang, testing and gauging if i'm still able to control him. thanks to those weight lifting sessions, strong pa din ako, haha! no really, if it weren't for that, i'm sure sugatan na ako. ang bigat when he pulls talaga. but shempre, he knows pa rin who's the head of the pack. his head kasi reaches na my thigh and if he stands on his hind legs, hanggang chest ko na sya. really huge.

there was this one time, i saw the trailer for hidalgo, sabi ko, sana i named him hidalgo na lang. my sister said he's to much of a softy to be called hidalgo. dapat nga boner, kaya lang my sister would kill me i'm sure, haha! he looks like a cyrus naman talaga. i'll post photos soon. he's a fluffy foo foo! he's super sweet and smelly!

haha! nice day for sleeping.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

updated my resume. ho humm. nothing better to do. my sister gave me a pedicure. oh and she is in page 14 of the oct 2006 issue of candy. street fashion. it's a small photo but she looks good there. she's really a great dresser, yun nga lang she's a little heavyset na din. so i woke up a little past 12 as i have started writing my story last night and slept around 4 am. watched tv, and until now, still unbathed. ho humm.

i'm still feeling low, but mom made ginatang bilo-bilo. i haven't had that for a long time. there are food kasi na i don't eat unless it's mom's cooking. cheery. will probably go to the studio later to finish up stenciling my baby sister's UN day costume.

talaga no, when you're in gradeschool or preschool, obligado ka sumali sa mga pageantry na super embarrassing pala hindi ka lang aware sa edad mong yon. kasi naman ang parents sadyang mga stage mom and dads talaga pero shempre in denial sila. well, when you get older, talagang swerte ka kung showbiz kang tao at willing ka to make a fool out of yourself. parang ung mga highschool students ko, wala kasing mga kabaklaan sa mga sarili yun kaya they really abhor itong mga spectacles na to. they really hate performing and halos magmakaawa pa kami sa kanila. at ang mga baliw mas marunong pa sa teachers. pag sinabi mo na merong ganito ganito, sasabihin, wag na ma'am, ganito na lang. mga bruha. kaya the theater group prefers the black light theater kasi hindi sila kailangan mag emote at magpakita sa tao.
it's too hot to do anything. potah, ebay is erroring. i'm trying to submit ung thing ko because i'm selling a 25 year old mosaic from italy. ayaw,naiinis ako. leche.
i have a headache. ang tagal ng ulan. please come down and cool us.

Friday, November 03, 2006

i had to delete everything i typed.

i already wrote about how i went to cubao without a car, about the surge of crowds coming and going, of making blythe wait in cubao. of lrt rides and parlor games. of food tripping and starbucks' red cups. of mike and joy coming over last night to listen to the crickets and gaze at the stars. of my days locked in the studio and scrubbing off paint from my hands.

and then i find myself depressed, again, thanks to a text message and a parent. i've been telling myself not to let my emotions get the best of me. that inspite of the events that had recently happened, i told myself, i'm cool. but then as much as i try, other people would hit the switch. and now i'm back where i started.

and to make things worse, i'm going to apply for the same role i had a few months back and i 'm going to make my life miserable again. so that i could save my sanity. so that my self-worth would stay intact and so that i can be away again. it doesn't even have to mean that i am swallowing my pride. it's just that i want to be a bird so that i can fly far far away.
whine, whine, i guess i do love misery and misery loves me, too.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

nov 1, 2006, 2am

I’m currently in my studio, and of course I have to curse a little under my breath. My studio is too messy. Sheets of paper are scattered about and the floor is dusty. I haven’t sprayed insecticide in a few weeks and there are tiny moth-like creatures in my tubs of paint. I am not in the mood to be depressed and waiting for paint to dry is certainly entertaining.

Last night I wanted to paint but ended up sleeping beside my laptop. Half of my body on the mattress and half on the floor, I started dreaming but forced myself to wake up because I knew I was in a terrible position and would probably wake up in the morning with paint all over me and all over the floor. I cleared everything up and settled myself in a better place (completely on top of the mattress) but opted to keep the lights on so that it’d hurt my eyes when I wake up and I‘d be forced to get up and not waste my time sleeping. I set the alarm for 3am so I could make myself useful, yet I haven’t thought of anything to paint. I fell asleep around 9 and woke up a little before 10 and decided to resume to lovely sleep with the lights still on.

I woke up at 10 (lazy ako) because the people next door were really noisy. They were listening to this radio station na masakit sa ulo. And my sister called me up and asked me to come to work. I complained a little because it’s my day off but agreed to go. I painted a canvass violet and took a nice bath. Scanned the bathroom and promised myself that I would clean up tomorrow.

Went to see the kids and was asked to go to a student’s birthday party. Bad trip kasi, when I woke up, I swore that I’ll go on a diet already. Of course I had to go, and of course I had to eat. The mommy made carbonara and cordon bleu for the kids and pinaputok na tilapia and steamed sigarilyas, talong, kangkong, and okra with a surprisingly amazing bagoong for the adults. I didn’t have okra of course, it’s on the same list with sinigang eh.

Ate and ran. I was supposed to get a free diamond peel with my cousin but I voted against it. Free nga eh, eh baka naman anu gawin nila sa face ko. Mahal ko pa ang mukha ko noh. Told her that I didn’t want to because they’d be selling her services that she won’t really need. So we went to the mall instead. I paid the last of my cellphone bills (yippee!) and got myself books from booksale. I bought 2 novels, and oddly enough, the covers almost look the same, even the font ha. Haha. The other one has pictures in it. Collector items, vintage lunchboxes. Wala lang.

Chrissele and Jo Anna came over and brought a microwavable container with the staple canned tuna with dinurog na fita. The fita dapat durog daw for the texture. And ate anne donated a can of corned beef. Haha. Chrissele told funny stories about her childhood kakulitan and embarrassing bladder issues. Ang galing nya because kami ni Jo almost don’t remember anything na. At shempre, we had to talk about my love issues. Forget the guy na daw. Oo nga, if it’s that easy, why not. Whatever. Hoy, wala akong issues noh!

Picked up the trash after they left. I checked on the doodles I made for the five small paintings I’m gonna do for my folio. Painted a little, had a shower and continued to write this. There’s scratching inside my weird wall (I’m in the attic eh). Yuk. Probably a cat, or a rat, two of the things I hate the most in this world. Hmp. Oh, and if you hate lizards, keep spraying insecticide. I wasn’t able to paint in 2 weeks and the studio’s been empty. Now, there is a gazillion pooping lizards in my bathroom and in the teeny corridor which can’t actually be called a corridor because it’s more of a stair landing or something like that. Mental note: clean up and spray around and feed the dog.