i'm still in the same state of mind since i left the last time for china. there's still a dark cloud above me and i'm not liking it. it's an ugly feeling when your heart just palpitates for no reason at all.
went to cubao today so gen and bim can pick me up on the way to a christening. while waiting for them, i got some OJ and sat outside a cafe. i kinda hurt my eyes a bit since i had to stare at the sky just to avoid looking at people. i clearly have no idea what annoys me or what causes me to be anxious when i go to the city. i mean, i can definitely stay out for a long time in the marketplace at changping town, but i hate being random anywhere in the PI. maybe because i understand what people talk about here.
in the shuttle:
gf: hindi ko maintindihan yang power hour(a quiz show of some sort) na yan! ang mga questions walang kwenta! may mga tanong ba naman na 'what field of mathematics deals with blah blah blah.."
bf: eh ano ba ang prize?
gf: foods ata...
still there are so many things in my mind. even though i know i need not worry, i still can't help but whine about stuff. ah, being human and having little faith. oh no, i have a lotta faith, i just need to whine, i think. gah. i feel. lonely.