Wednesday, September 14, 2005

lagnat laki

i am either losing my marbles or just simply letting go. i find myself doodling and writing down random thoughts more. on paper. i want to just be.

i have asked people to come paint with me. i need to fly.

i went to my studio last sunday afternoon to check on the damage the hole on the roof caused. it just got my floor dirty. i'm moving back there by next week. i need to focus. and organize. and stop being a bore to myself.

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i know you can't actually read what i typed with the pictures. it doesn't matter anyway.

i was looking at my pictures from 8 years ago last sunday night. i was with chrisselle. it was really frustrating to see me that way. i had a flat tummy, and everything on my face was so defined. i have a goal now. i will lose weight!! i swear. i may not turn out that way again, but at least i could fit in those size jeans again harhar.

i can't do this anymore. everyday, i tell myself, i will let go of the job. but everyone else says differently. okay, let me swallow some of whatever pride i have left and see where this would take me.

i am getting older and older by the minute.

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